lowbrowculture

collects stories and ideas from John Kelly

Fussy

Thus at the next cocktail hour, I reached for the bottle of Poland’s finest in my freezer. (Of course I keep vodka in the freezer. As Jack Donaghy would say, “What am I, a farmer?”) Staring at the frosty bottle, however, caused flashbacks to Unpleasant Speculums I Have Known. Instead, I rooted around in a kitchen cupboard for some cheap (but warm) vodka left over from a party. There it was, in a jug. Not even my kids would sneak sips of this stuff. And I didn’t think that that particular area of my body would be especially fussy about brands.

Skeptical of the story going around the internet about teenagers using booze-soaked tampons to get drunk, HuffPo writer Danielle Crittenden decides to try it for herself.