One of these things is not like the other

Things I found out this weekend:

1. My uncle - the conspiracy nut - is so convinced that the end-times are coming that he’s spent €200 on non-perishable, tinned foods. He’s storing them at different, strategic points around the house.
2. My 18-year old niece - who ran away to Egypt to get married - has left her husband and is now on the run from him. She won’t tell anyone where she is. She let the husband know she’d left him by changing her Facebook status to “single”.
3. My mother has cancer.