lowbrowculture

collects stories and ideas from John Kelly

Is Batman actually a Superhero?

batman_boner.jpg

I was speaking to someone earlier about superpowers - how all childhood conversations about “what superpower would you like to have” were ruined by the one asshole who had to say “everything” - when our conversation drifted towards Batman. When I was growing up, you either liked Superman or Batman (just like you were either a Whizz-kid or a Chipite). And so the Superman-followers would want Superman’s powers and the Batman-followers would say they would like Batman’s superpowers.

But what the hell are Batman’s superpowers?

He can’t fly. He can’t run faster than a speeding bullet. He can’t slice people open with Adamantium claws. So what does he have? Well, he’s got a neat car and a lot of nifty gadgets. And he’s pretty athletic, I guess. But these aren’t super-powers. With enough money, anyone can have these.

And is this a good message for our kids? That being fabulously wealthy is a superpower?

(For more pictures of Joker’s boners, check out redshirt.co.uk)